One Year Ago

One year ago on Saturday I found out that I was pregnant. It was also the day that I left for India for two weeks for work. The timing was perfect! Most importantly, I knew not to take my anti-malaria medication while I was there (does not mix well with developing babies). Also, when I started feeling sick midway through the trip, I knew that it was most likely morning sickness and nothing that I should take medication for (also does not mix well with developing babies). I also knew to be super extra careful about what I ate. But aside from my physical health, it was perfect timing for my mental and emotional well-being. The night before I left, I started to cry (hormones??). I was mad at myself for agreeing to be gone for two weeks. It was the longest I had been away from Ben. And the thought of being away from him was almost too much for me. So, the next morning, when I found out I was carrying Adelyn, it was such a comfort! I wasn't alone in India! And she was my little secret. When I was feeling lonely at night in the hotel, I would place my hand on my belly and talk to the wonderful being that was growing inside of me.

Thank you Adelyn, for coming with me to India. You helped me more than words can describe.

Sing a Song

A few days after my post about singing to Adelyn, I started up again (I caught a cold so I didn't start right away). The first day back to singing, I was singing "Arms of Love" by Amy Grant. Apparently, Adelyn does not like that song. She stopped eating, so I looked down at her and her lower lip was out and quivering! As soon as I changed songs, she smiled and went back to eating. Silly girl. And now sometimes she will stop eating to sing along with me. So, sometimes I cut the singing time short so she will get back to eating. Her current favorite is "GLYSDI" (God Loves You, So Do I). Tonight we sang that song several times AFTER she was done eating.

Girl's Weekend 2010

Last weekend was my annual Girl's Weekend. I really look forward to the time with my friends. Usually it's during the summer, but with having Adelyn, our tradition was thrown a bit. This past weekend was it! This year we went to Hastings. No particular reason other than it was close by, but far enough away from normal to make it feel like a get away.

We set out in the morning. It was a quick drive there. And pretty too. It was about peak for the trees. We walked around Main Street for a bit and got a lunch recommendation. We headed over to the Muddy Waters Cafe for lunch. After lunch we went to Elm Spa for facials and massages. The facial was great and the Chai tea was awesome. Instead of heading to an apple orchard like we had planned, we were all too relaxed to want to do much. So we checked into our hotel and talked about a dinner plan. We ended up at a Mexican place that kind of reminded me of El Loro. But you only get one basket of chips. What's up with that?? But dinner was good. Then it was hot tub time! Then we played games (Who, What, Where) and talked. And talked. The next morning we hit a cafe for breakfast and were on our way home.

I had a great time! It was so nice to be with my friends for more than just a quick chat. It was hard to be away from Adelyn though. Especially since she was on a hunger strike and didn't want to eat from a bottle (even though she has before). I am so thankful that Ben wanted me to have this time and that he made it work.

Reclaiming My Voice

From the very beginning, I have sang to Adelyn while feeding her. Not at all feedings, but at least two per day. The songs would range from Broadway hits, to the Oldies, to children songs to hymns. It was a way to pass the time, but also I think another way to bond. Then one day I stopped singing. My excuse was that we were at a lake cabin with friends and I was embarrassed to be overheard. So, I picked up my phone and used that to pass the time instead. I read emails, checked in on FaceBook, played games, you name it. After leaving the lake, that habit stayed. I looked forward to doing all those things while feeding Adelyn. Then this week, I realized that I hadn't been singing to my daughter for weeks! And this made me very sad. Instead of using the feedings to bond with her, I was bonding with my phone. I decided that this has got to stop.

So, I am working on kicking the phone habit. I told Ben about my conviction so that he could help keep me accountable. I have started to leave my phone other places so I won't be tempted to use it. And I am working on remembering all the songs I used to sing to her.

I love that I'm back to singing. I think Adelyn likes it too because sometimes she hums along while she eats. These are precious moments that I am trying to not take advantage of because all too soon they will be over. I'm just thankful I realized what was happening before it was too late.